How can we be at our best when we are resisting our own resistance?
Sounds confusing, doesn’t it? And yet people do this all the time…
Our resistance is there to tell us something. It is a guide, much like a map, that is telling you what to go towards and work through. And yet there are many people that when met with resistance, they run for the hills.
Running away from our own resistance further pushes it away or back down inside of us. We will then have to wait for it to resurface again. And it will come back. You can be assured of that. But when it does, it will come back with more intensity. That resistance is our energetic mind and body’s way of sending us a message that is saying “Look at me. Look into me. I’m trying to get your attention.”
And right now, more than ever, the collective, lower consciousness of humanity is resisting its own resistance. Many are tuning out from what their better choices would be and are tuning in to their favorite distraction. Whether it is food, drugs, alcohol, television, social media, news, online shopping, you name it – rest assured that these distractions are serving their purpose. They are a temporary filler for an empty void that is screaming out for our attention. Temporary is the key word here, as this distraction is guaranteed to be short lived and no long-term satisfaction will be gained.
So why is it so hard for some of us to do what is best for us, but instead gravitate towards what gives us short-term gratification?
Well, it could be a number of things…
When we look at the results in our lives, we are able to tune into some of those answers.
#1 – It could be that we have a subconscious death urge that has been playing out for many years that we are completely unaware of. That may sound extreme, but there are many that have the needle tipped towards that of an unconscious death urge rather than a conscious life urge.
If you aren’t sure if this could be you, or someone you know, then think about the number of times you have sabotaged yourself, or think of someone you know that is constantly down or depressed, or that creates a mess in their lives that always needs cleaning up. This is someone that could well have a subconscious death urge that they are unaware of. This is likely a person that subconsciously generally doesn’t want help (though they might say they do). They are looping around an old program that takes over and is running their life and choices.
The results in their life show that they are playing out an unconscious urge to end it all – they might even make Freudian slips like, “What’s the point? I’m never going to achieve my dreams anyway,” “I didn’t think I would live this long,” “Wow… I screwed up again,” “I just know I’m going to catch this virus and die,” you get the idea… Most that are in this category have no idea this is what is going on. Because they are so out of touch with their own higher self and with the making of healthier, more productive choices for themselves.
#2 – It could be that we lack self-love and we unconsciously sabotage their lives, because we feel unworthy – unworthy of love, unworthy of happiness, unworthy of having financial security, etc… This is a person that is never content and often brings misery upon themselves. It is impossible for them to attain what they desire, because they have an old program running that says they do not deserve any of these things.
If you aren’t sure if you are one of these people, try this test: go to a mirror and look yourself in the eye. Say these words aloud 3 times: “I deeply and completely love and accept myself just the way I am.” And then as you are standing before the mirror, purposely pause just to see what comes up for you. As in, what are you now thinking, how are you now feeling? If this exercise is difficult or impossible for you to do, then you are one of the people in this category.
Remember that when we subconsciously believe that we don’t deserve something, we will never have it. Not because we are a bad person, rather it is because our subconscious now believes it as true. Let’s say we don’t love ourselves, or that we have a challenging time in loving ourselves, this can then make it difficult for others to love us.
Self-forgiveness is what leads to self-love, yet it is one of the most difficult things for people to do – to forgive that is. This is one of the simplest and quite frankly one of the most powerful acts of transformational healing that we can do for ourselves.
It is like being freed from a prison to truly forgive. When the shackles of imprisonment, that hold the judgment we have been keeping ourselves and others in, figuratively fall off – we will immediately feel lighter. Depending upon how complete we are with our forgiveness, we could see a turn-around in our health, and a significant shift in our entire mood.
#3 – It could be that we have a limiting belief or an old program that is running us. When these limiting beliefs and old programs take over, there is little we can do to stop it, until we become aware of the pattern that repeats itself as it is playing out. Usually by just simply slowing down, we can spot these things by reflecting on what it is that is playing out in our lives – perhaps for the second or third (or seventh or eighth) time.
Maybe we have a habit of keeping ourselves stressed over finances, by spending money as soon as we get it (satisfying an unhealthy addiction), or we attract the same types of people into our lives – such as an abuser, a manipulator, a cheater, an enabler, or perhaps we draw in people that we think we can rescue. Only to have them possibly turn on us and drain our energy.
It is hard for us to admit, and even to uncover within our own subconscious, that when these things happen to us, they are coming from within us. And that we truly have the power to change and/or heal them.
If any of these above 3 categories apply to you, then you are likely having a hard time reading this and are thinking “no way this is coming from me.” But brace yourself, because it is.
The good news is that no one has to continue in these types of pain and suffering. But when we choose (perhaps at an unconscious level) to keep moving down that darker path, even when help is being offered, we have entered into the phase of unnecessary suffering. It is then that we are resisting our own resistance. And we are also resisting the message that resistance is trying to send us, telling us to accept the help that is being offered.
When you look at it like that it just seems crazy that anyone would say NO to free help. This is where their Ego is more than likely playing a trick on them saying things like: “you don’t need this,” “this is not the truth,” “there’s got to be a catch, nothing is free.” But rest assured, that is a tactic of the Ego. It is attempting to keep us from getting help and from getting a handle on any of the above 3 areas that have kept us in some form of sabotage of our own lives.
The Ego wants to keep our addictions, distractions and our weaknesses intact to keep us in a place where it can get what it wants – which at its core is to protect itself from ever being hurt. You see, the Ego in and of itself is never going to want what is good for us, as in our healing, or some kind of a change that is going to actually move the needle forward in our personal or professional lives.
So, we have got to get good at recognizing when we are resisting our own resistance. This is a trick of the Ego. The best way to get better at this is to have someone in your corner that can give you a reality check from time to time. Whether it is a good friend that will be totally honest with you, a coach or mentor, or a program that is calling out to you that wants to support you – just do it. Connect with them for your greater good.
Remember that we are not alone – we are all in this together and there are many programs and support tools being offered right now. More than ever before, we are being supported to rise above our old habits, old programs and old actions and to evolve into a stronger, healthier, better version of ourselves.
If you would like to release some resistance and to move into a better place of flow in your life, then my meditation on Forgiveness could help you do just that.
Follow this link to learn more.